Life’s too short….

It happened again yesterday. I saw someone using the “life’s too short” argument to justify a hazardous lifestyle.

What is up with that kind of attitude?

I mean, I agree, life is too short, and that is why I am doing my best to try to make my life last as long as possible.

I suspect the life’s-too-short people are hedonists. They are existers, on this Earth for a short while, just trying to get by, extracting as much pleasure out of life as possible. They believe the living of life is an end unto itself. They don’t care whether they leave anything lasting behind.

I don’t know, and, honestly, I don’t harshly judge people who have that attitude. As long as they aren’t hurting anyone, they can do as they please. Life is short.

As I implied, though, I really don’t understand that way of thinking.

If I am only here for a short while, I want to try to make an impact on the world. I would like to be remembered as someone who influenced others, who helped people along the way. I’d like to be remembered as someone that people truly miss, rather than as someone who was simply chasing fun all the time.

So, yeah, I am not an “at least he died happy” person. Happiness implies a level of satisfaction that leads to complacency. I never want to be satisfied or complacent — I want to keep moving forward.

Life, to me, is a series of challenges — games, if you prefer. Loading the dishwasher so all the silverware gets clean. Making something delicious for dinner with ingredients I already happen to have on hand. Setting an unreasonable deadline for a project and finishing it on time. That’s how I live.

So, then, living beyond my maximum life expectancy, well, that seems like the biggest challenge of all, right?

We’ll see how that goes. Life’s too short. Indeed.

To reach your goals, you have to prioritize them

I had an email conversation the other day with a very good friend of mine. He owns his own business, which is struggling right now, but he’s getting it back off the ground. He’s found a little traction, so, in a moment of optimistic reality checking, he decided to make a list of business goals. He put some very specific things in his goal sheet, including numbers for where he should be tomorrow, in 6 months, in a year, in 2 years, in 5 years, and in 10 years.

All in all, I thought my friend’s goals for his business were realistic and attainable. They were well-thought out, and I really enjoyed seeing that he is putting some time into figuring out where his business should go.

When I was done reading through the goals, though, I emailed him back.

It’s great to have goals. Now you need to make plans to accomplish them. For example, if your goal is a new customer tomorrow, what exactly will you do to try to make that happen?

I didn’t hear from him after that…. Perhaps he’s just busy making those plans.

Even though I’ve written in the past that goals may be a problem for some people, I really do believe that it’s important to have them. But you know what is even more important? Taking action to reach those goals.

Let’s use an example goal of “Lose 10 pounds by June 30th”.

How can you reach that goal? If you are a fast-food junkie, maybe you could plan only to eat fast food on Wednesdays.

That might work!

Now, then, unless you execute the plan, the goal is about worthless.

Let’s look at that seemingly simple plan: Cutting back to eating fast food only on Wednesdays.

You may look at that and think, “I can do that. I only eat fast food 4 days a week now. Cutting back to 1 day would be easy.” Will it? Seems like it should be, especially since you’ve already decided it’s a good idea.

The first week goes great! Your resolve is strong and you have a pretty good plan.

Over the weekend, you pick up some healthy foods at the grocery store. You get up early enough every day to make yourself a real breakfast and prepare a lunch to take to work. After work, you enjoy making dinner, trying new foods. You don’t miss your McMuffins, Whataburgers with cheese, and finger-lickin’ good chicken. Hell, you even skip fast food on Wednesday, because you feel so good about how you are eating!

Then comes the busy weekend. You go to a movie with your family. Everyone wants to go to go to Sonic, and you reason, “Well, I skipped my Wednesday fast food day, I’ll just have it today.” That’s cool.

Monday morning rolls around again, and you realize you are out of breakfast foods, because you didn’t get to the store over the weekend. You make your box lunch with the last of your lunch fixin’s, but you are starving, so you say to yourself, “I’ll just have my fast-food day today instead of Wednesday,” and you grab some breakfast tacos on the way in to work.

You end up working late and can’t get home for dinner — good thing this is your fast food day, you think, as you snarf that Big Mac and fries. You’re so beat as you head home that you don’t stop at the grocery store to pick up some healthy breakfast and lunch foods.

The next day, you hit a drive-thru for breakfast again, and you say to yourself, “Well, this week is a bust. I’ll get back on it next week.”

But you never do.

I cannot tell you how many times that scenario played out in my life. Maybe not exactly that way, but pretty close.

So … what happened?

The goal was there. The plan was there. This thing failed, however, in the execution of the plan.

If you have a fitness goal, that’s great, but that only puts you part of the way there. Creating a plan is important, too, but, of course, the execution of that plan is the most important piece of the puzzle.

How can you be more successful?

Prioritize your fitness. I wrote a post about that before, but let’s look at the concept here, in terms of the practical example above.

The priorities were in place the first week. You hit the store for food. You made sure you had enough time to make yourself breakfast and lunch. You were cooking great dinners.

The plan started to go awry, however, with the fast food on Saturday. Wednesday was supposed to be “Fast Food” day. Saturday is not Wednesday. However, your family’s desires took the priority away from your fitness goal.

The weekend slipped away without your going to the store to pick up more healthy food options for your breakfasts and lunches. That was your restful Sunday taking the priority away from your fitness goal.

Monday morning fast food? Well, you knew that was wrong, but when that laps spilled over into Tuesday, well, that was your fitness goal being out-prioritized by everything else in your life.

And that is how we fail. We fail to put fitness at the top of the priority list.

You may say, “But, Steve, dining with my family is more important to me than quitting fast food.” Okay, fine, that’s valid. I guess. Right? That’s a decision for you to make.

I can tell you from my own experience that family desires, job requirements, relaxation needs — those are all things that are high on my priority list. But when I finally decided to get fit, I had to move fitness to the top of the list.

“Thanks for making that birthday cake for me, mom, but I’m not going to have any.” Do you think that was an easy conversation? No. But this is my fitness — and my health — we are talking about, so it’s my responsibility. If that means I won’t be eating cake, pizza, and hot wings with the family, so be it.

You may be able to be less strict. You may be able to at least have a bite of the cake, a half-slice of the pizza, just one of the wings. If you can do that, more power to you.

But if you are able to do that, that’s great, and it shows that you have prioritized fitness. When you prioritize fitness, you’ll be well on your way to executing your fitness plan, and, therefore, achieving your fitness goals!

Being fat is not inevitable

Fitness is a lifelong struggle. It takes work. I tell young people all the time, “Develop a fitness habit now, because when you get older, it’s that much harder to get into the swing of things.”

How often do we not even try a fitness program, because we “know” beforehand that we will not be able to complete it? How many times has our prejudgement of the outcome caused us not to even attempt it in the first place?

We almost certainly base this attitude on past fitness failures.

You know, when we were young and saw the first signs of body bulge, we watched our calories or carbs and hit the gym. That lasted a little while, months or years even, but then our lives filled up, and fitness took a back seat.

A few years — and more than a few pounds — later, we decided that we have got to do something about all this weight we’ve gained. We joined a gym, tried to do the same routines we did back in the day, but it wasn’t so easy anymore, and, anyway, our lives kept interrupting. With our long hours at work, it was just impossible to eat right. The kids — the kids — were always needing a ride here or there. Oh, and then there was that morning we woke up and couldn’t move our neck for 2 weeks.

Now we are even older and fatter. We think about the gym — are we really still paying the monthly membership? — but we know that’s not going to work. We look around and we compare ourselves with others our age, and we come to the conclusion that, “Being fat is inevitable. Might as well get used to it.”

I was so there. That story is mine — well, without the kids — and it may be a lot like yours, too.

So what can you do? You have to do something? Or are you happy being overweight? You know that being overweight is the road to diabetes, heart disease, and cancer, so you would like to lose some pounds, but if your mindset is that the path to fatness is inevitable, then you will likely just accept that “fact” and take your chances. After all, not everyone dies of cancer, heart disease, and diabetes, right?

Well, hell, go buy yourself a carton of cigarettes, then, if that’s your attitude. After all, only 20% or 25% of smokers get lung cancer.

The other day, a friend of mine was telling me that he knows he needs to find time for fitness, but he is just can’t work it into his schedule. Believe me, I get that.

Regardless of your reasons for not eating right, for not exercising, at some point, something will click. Something will change inside your brain that says, “You know what? I need to make time to get healthy and fit.”

I don’t know what it will be for you. I really don’t know what it was for me.

I mean, I know I was feeling weird pains. I know I was on medications that I didn’t want to be on. I know I was shopping for size 44 pants. I know I saw a photo of my fat self that jarred me. But I have no specific recollection of an epiphany. It just happened.

At some point, I knew I had to turn things around.

At some point I realized that being fat is not inevitable.

I hope that realization comes to you before it’s too late.

Is being overweight some kind of joke?

I was on Facebook the other day — as I often am — and one of my friends, a person I know and like, not just some random Facebook “friend”, posted the following:

  • “Double-chocolate fudge brownie for breakfast! #thatiswhyimfat”

Cute, right?

A few people commented on the post, primarily laughing along with him, commenting on why they are fat themselves, offering up other desserts that might make good breakfasts, all with a few LOLs tossed into the mix.

As I said, I know this guy, and he’s a bit pudgy, but he’s not hugely obese, so maybe that’s why he jokes about it. He knows he needs to lose a few, but might never get around to it.

But why laugh about it?

A big part of the reason we laugh at being overweight is because, for most people under the age of 40, dropping pounds is more about looking good than feeling good, and everyone feels good when they’re young, right? So, maybe at some point, looking good is not a priority, which means there’s no real need to lose weight.

You know the story. Life takes over once we graduate from high school and college. We get a real job, find ourselves in a long-term relationship, have a kid or two, and, yeah, we gain a few pounds. No big deal, it happens to everyone. We just buy bigger clothes and accept the idea that as we age, we gain weight. Plus, we’re busy, so we don’t really have time to worry so much about how we look.

As we get older, though, we start to see the health implications of being fat. We have pain for no apparent reason. Our joints start to ache. Our doctor puts us on medications, and at that point many of us try to drop poundage to bring down our blood pressure, cholesterol, lower our risk of heart disease, and just to, overall, feel better.

Anyway, back to the Facebook comment, I can’t help but wonder if my friend would have received the same light-hearted responses to his status update, if his hashtag had been #thatiswhyillgetheartdisease or #thatiswhyillbediabetic or #thatiswhyilldieyoungerthanishould.

Not so cute now, right?

Excess fat on our bodies leads to a host of ills, including heart disease, diabetes, hypertension — this is well-documented. But still we joke about it, and our friends joke about it right along with us.

There is a point where we know it’s no longer a joke, though, right? We all know a super huge person or 2 (or 3 or 4 or 5 these days), and we don’t joke about that kind of obesity. That guy has a problem, not us. Many of us, though, do have a problem, and we don’t even know it.

According to the Centers for Disease Control, more than 35% of the adults in the United States are obese, which is defined as a BMI (body mass index) of 30 or more. Are you part of the 35%?

The CDC provides an easy way for you to calculate your BMI here.

Even if you are not obese, are you overweight, with a BMI of 25 or higher? You have to be overweight before you’re obese, hint, hint.

The bottom line is that our excess body fat is killing us, so, come on, let’s stop joking about being fat and start doing something about it by getting our diets in line! And, trust me on this, if you start eating right when you are younger, you’ll be a whole lot better off when you’re older.

Need help? Email me at .

Is there really that much difference between “excuses” and “reasons”?

If you look at the successful people around you, you may notice that they are men and women of various colors and walks of life, but there is one thing they all have in common: They get things done.

What does that mean, exactly?

Well, while most of us are sitting around, accepting the reasons we can’t do something, successful people are either ignoring those reasons or working around them.

Please note that I said “reasons” and not “excuses”. I’m sure we all understand the difference between the two.

While we may think that “excuses” are concocted in the minds of lazy people, we look at “reasons” as valid considerations. For example, if you skip running because you have to sit on your butt watching the Gilligan-a-thon on TBS — that’s an excuse. If you skip running because there are hurricane conditions outside — that’s a reason.

The problem with that very valid way of thinking, though, is that there is always a good reason not to do something! Consequently, reasons turn into excuses.

I lived that “reason”able life for a long time, and most of it involved finding time to work out. I always had something else I had to do that would prevent my workout. Because I work for myself, the reasons would usually involve some task I needed to do “right now” for a client. Why did it need to be done “right now”? It’s pretty simple — “work” was higher than “working out” on my priority list.

That’s understandable. A big part of my business model relies on responsiveness to my clients’ needs.

But you know what I discovered when I finally decided to understand that my “reasons” were really “excuses”? My clients could easily wait that extra 90 minutes. After all, it’s not very often that website design, photography, and videography create emergency situations that must be addressed immediately.

None of the examples here may apply to you, so look at your life and evaluate the “reasons” you lose focus of your fitness goals. Are they really good enough to keep putting off your fitness program, or are they simply more excuses for you to stay unfit and unhealthy?